Finally did it, I ended up having to use fuse 7 to trigger the existing relay, don't know if the diodes were actually needed but I'll keep them there since it's not hurting anything. No code for the relay either AFAIK. I can't thank you enough, you just put an end to almost a year of fiddling and troubleshooting that was driving me crazy.
Glad to help! This is how I do it, sans the relay. I would think when using it the diodes aren't necessary, but if it works, it works
